Day 150

My Quit
My Stats:
Your Quit Date is:  6/24/2005 6:30:00 PM Time 
Smoke-Free: 148 days, 15 hours, 1 minute and 49 seconds
Cigarettes NOT smoked: 2973
Lifetime Saved:  22 days, 17 hours
Money Saved: $521.50

pardon my showing off just a bit .. 149 days of being a nonsmoker .. it seems like a lifetime

these stats are from www . quitnet . com .. they really helped me during the hardest first few weeks when i quit smoking, but even now i can't wait to see my current stats .. especially how much lifetime i've saved by not smoking

i'm seeing more and more people who really do want to quit smoking .. i see that as more lives being saved .. a few weeks ago there was a brief discussion in one journal (forgive me for forgetting which one lol) about how outraged one journaler was when a city decided to ban outdoor smoking at public places .. a few months ago i would have stood on her soapbox, right along with her, in an attempt to voice my displeasure with the government telling people what they have the right to do in public

i have such a different perspective now .. why do people think they have the RIGHT to smoke in public?  with all the proof on the damages of second hand smoke, why would any reasonable smoker want to risk hurting another person with their own bad habit?  with all the proof that smoking kills .. how can anybody feel proud about killing themselves, let alone in public?

i can remember when it was COOL to smoke .. we had cigarette ads everywhere .. we had the marlboro man .. plus a handful of other cigarette icons .. smoking was glorified in the movies and on TV .. everybody smoked and it was acceptable .. slowly my daughters generation is realizing how dangerous and NOT cool smoking is .. one of the T-shirts being sold now is a cigarette with the circle and slash through it and beneath says "there are much cooler ways to kill yourself"

on top of all this, i was watching a show a few days ago .. about problems with littering in public places .. i had NO idea that almost 30% of littering is done by cigarette smokers .. tsk tsk tsk

just because you are killing yourself, doesn't give smokers the right to be rude too eh !!!

being a person who is a beginner nonsmoker, i'll be the first to admit that having to walk through a group of people standing on the sidewalk, smoking, really IS difficult for me to do .. i guess i'm just getting to the place where i'm starting to resent having to breathe other peoples cigarette smoke ::shrugging::

i'm all for banning smoking in public places .. lets stop exposing our children to cigarettes .. stop smoking in public for the children .. our children .. and keep our fingers crossed that they remain smarter and wiser than my own generation

::stepping off my soapbox::  sorry, i just had to get that out of my system :)

i've realized that the last week have been a transition period for me .. in changing from the massive chemo treatment to the radiation and chemo treatment really has been a transition period

i don't know any of the people .. the employees, the patients .. i don't know anything about the procedures, the side effects .. i'm having to learn so many new things .. i have always taken comfort in routines .. i kinda get shaken up when somebody screws with my routines :)

what is shaking me up the most are the change i'm noticing in the patients .. up on the second floor, in oncology .. we all sat around dressed in street clothes .. some of the females donning various head covers, hats, caps, wigs .. our faces a little drawn and tired but mostly in good spirits .. except for the fact that we were all hooked up to IV's, a pretty normal looking group

downstairs in the radiation oncology waiting room, we are actually a pretty sorry looking group of patients sitting around in hospital gowns that don't come close to fitting us .. each and every patient i've met so far has an exhausted look on their face .. walking slower, needing assistance in standing up .. some still smile, some still laugh .. but they're different .. tired .. one female patient decided to drop her gown and show me her scars from her double mastectomy and the results of radiation .. her raw red skin that was peeling off in chunks .. i'm not sure why she thought i wanted to see her scars .. i didn't .. like i wasn't scared enough

anyway .. i've got piles and piles of budgets to get working on for the office .. not like i'm in ANY frame of mind to be concentrating on details like this but i kinda don't have an option .. i hope the rest of y'all enjoy what is left of your weekend :)